Military Divorce Checklist: What to Do Before, During, and After

Military divorces have federal deadlines that civilian divorces do not. Missing these deadlines can mean losing a survivor annuity, health coverage, or even owing money that the government will take from future payments. This military divorce checklist explains what both the service member and the spouse need to do at each step, from gathering paperwork before filing to sending notifications after the divorce is final. Use this resource along with our military divorce guide, which explains the rules in more detail.

This information is not legal advice. Each state has its own laws for dividing property, so make sure a military divorce attorney reviews anything related to retirement or survivor benefits before you sign.

Before You File: Gather Your Financial Documentation

Most military entitlements depend on two key dates: when you got married and how long your marriage overlapped with the member’s creditable service. Begin your military divorce checklist with these dates, since they affect retirement division, survivor benefits, and health coverage.

• Leave and Earnings Statement (LES): Shows base pay, BAH, and BAS, and it is where support calculations begin.

• Service records: Entry date and current creditable service years, plus retirement point statements for Guard or Reserve members.

• Marriage-to-service overlap: Line up the marriage date against the service timeline to see where you fall on the thresholds below.

• Benefit records: Current SBP election status, VA award or rating letter, TRICARE enrollment, and beneficiary designations.

• Debts and accounts: Marital debt gets divided too, so know what is owed before you negotiate.

The three length-of-marriage rules that decide most benefits:

During Proceedings: Use Your SCRA Protections

The Servicemembers Civil Relief Act (SCRA) helps make sure that an active-duty service member is not divorced by default while deployed and unable to respond. It does not prevent the divorce or favor either side. Instead, it gives the service member extra time to take part in decisions about their retirement and children, rather than having those choices made without them.

• Request a stay: An active-duty member can ask the court to pause the case. The initial stay generally runs 90 days and can be extended if duty continues.

• Document the reason: A stay request requires a letter that explains how military duties affect availability and specifies when the member will be available.

• Do not ignore the papers: SCRA guards against default judgments, but it is not a reason to skip responding.

• Settle jurisdiction early: A military divorce can often be filed where the member is stationed, where they are domiciled, or where the spouse resides, and that choice shapes how property is divided.

Getting the Decree Right: Retirement and Survivor Language

Federal pay agencies will only follow an order if it uses the correct wording, so the divorce decree is crucial in a military divorce. Couples often want to move quickly once they agree on the main points, but a single unclear sentence can cause problems years later when DFAS interprets the order exactly as it is written.

• Properly divide retirement: Under the USFSPA, a state court can divide disposable retired pay. The 2017 frozen benefit rule caps the divisible amount on the member's rank and service years as of the date of divorce.

• Know the 10/10 rule: The court order awards the share; this rule governs only how it is paid. If the marriage overlapped at least 10 years of creditable service, DFAS pays the awarded share directly. Below that, the award still stands, but the member pays out of pocket each month.

• Watch the VA disability waiver: VA disability is not divisible. When a member waives retired pay for tax-free VA disability, the former spouse's share shrinks with it (Mansell v. Mansell, reinforced by Howell v. Howell). Concurrent Retirement and Disability Pay (CRDP) can restore waived pay at a 50 percent rating or higher and is generally divisible; Combat-Related Special Compensation (CRSC) is not.

• Name survivor coverage explicitly: A decree that is silent on the Survivor Benefit Plan gives the pay center nothing to act on.

The One-Year Clock: Survivor Benefit Plan Election

Missing this one-year deadline is the costliest mistake you can make during a military divorce, and it is rarely excused. This deadline often passes unnoticed because there are no reminders. Even if the decree orders the coverage and both people plan to follow through, the benefit disappears if no one submits the paperwork on time.

• Coverage is not automatic: Former-spouse SBP does not transfer just because the decree divides the pension.

• Two election paths: The member files DD Form 2656-1, or the former spouse files a deemed election on DD Form 2656-10 with a certified copy of the order.

• One-year deadline: Both elections run for one year from the date of the divorce decree.

• File it yourself: If you are the former spouse, submit the deemed election on your own within days of the decree and keep proof of the date. Miss the window, and the annuity is generally lost for good.

After the Decree: DEERS, ID Cards, and Health Coverage

After the decree is signed, you will need to handle several administrative tasks. Health coverage is usually the most urgent. The options for your former spouse mostly depend on the 20-year rules, so check those before assuming any benefits will continue.

• Update DEERS in person: Bring a certified copy of the decree to an ID card office to correct the former spouse's status.

• Check the 20-year rules: 20/20/20 keeps TRICARE, commissary, and exchange access as the former spouse's own sponsor until they remarry. 20/20/15, which also requires 20 years of service, gives one year of TRICARE and no base shopping.

• Line up bridge coverage: A former spouse who meets neither rule can buy CHCBP for up to 36 months but must elect within 60 days of losing TRICARE. Divorce is also a TRICARE qualifying life event, with a 90-day window to change plans.

• Return the ID and base housing: The dependent ID ends at divorce, and the branches generally expect the former spouse to leave government housing within about 30 days.

BAH and Pay Adjustments

BAH is one of the most misunderstood pieces of a military divorce, mostly because both sides assume it works like income that can simply be split. It cannot, but it still shapes the numbers in ways that affect both households.

• BAH goes to the member: It is always paid to the service member, never directly to the former spouse.

• The rate can drop: Losing a spouse as a dependent can move the member from the with-dependents rate to the without-dependents rate, unless they keep physical custody of a child.

• It counts as income: though untaxed, BAH is included when courts calculate child and, often, spousal support. A member paying support without custody may be subject to BAH-Diff rules.

• Fix the record: Once custody and support are set, correct the member's dependency status to ensure pay is correct going forward.

Notify the VA: Dependent Removal and Overpayment Debt

If you are a veteran receiving disability compensation, missing this step can turn a divorce into unexpected debt. At first, you will not get a bill or any warning. The extra payment for your spouse will keep coming until the VA notices and asks you to repay it all.

• Remove the former spouse: A veteran rated 30 percent or higher gets extra compensation for a spouse. File VA Form 21-686c to remove the former spouse, and the spouse portion ends the month after the decree.

• File promptly: If the VA continues paying the higher rate, that amount becomes an overpayment that will be recovered from future disability checks.

• Keep the issues separate: VA disability is not divisible in the divorce, but it can still count toward child or spousal support.

Key Forms and Deadlines

Acting on Your Military Divorce Checklist

A military divorce runs two processes at once: the divorce the court handles, and the federal benefit actions that fall on you and answer to their own deadlines. If you take nothing else from this military divorce checklist, hold onto the three that do not forgive a late filing: the one-year Survivor Benefit Plan election, the 60-day CHCBP window, and the VA dependent removal that becomes overpayment debt the longer it sits. Handle the rest in order, and you keep a hard year from following you into the next one. If you are sorting out your income, benefits, and debts as the dust settles, take a few minutes to use our benefits questionnaire to ensure nothing is left on the table.

Last reviewed September 2026. Deadlines, thresholds, and dollar figures change over time. Confirm current rules on official DFAS, TRICARE, and VA pages, and consult a military divorce attorney before acting on anything tied to retirement or survivor benefits.